Are Women Better Parents Than Men?

Women Parents Versus Men

I have been meaning to join in with The Prompt for some time, and now, when I finally get around to it, I am faced with this question. ‘Are women better parents than men?’ That is not exactly an easy question!

What would ‘a better parent’ look like?

Is the better parent the one who feeds and clothes the child? Is it the person who can stop the tears or the one who gives the biggest hugs.  Does the better parent say ‘no’ or do they say ‘yes’, when our children try to dictate the things they want in life.

The problem is, if you judge one parent to be better than another based on these things, the chances are you are judging them based on who spends the most time with the child. If one parent spends more time with a child, whilst the other is, for example out at work, then of course that person will have a different sort of relationship with the child. Parenting, joyous though it is, can still be hard work. And like most things in life we learn an awful lot through experience. You cannot say one is better than the other, if the truth is that one person has more experience!

And actually, sometimes, the parent that spends more time with their child, can almost be too close. Too many tantrums, too many spoilt meals – it can be easy to lose sight of the bigger picture, and become overwhelmed by the simple things.

These things are true of both men and women!

The question reminds me of a conversation I once had with a very dear friend. She suggested that another person was my ‘best friend’. I was quite shocked and told her that was not true. I advised her I did not have a best friend. I had many friends, but my relationship with each was different. Some made me laugh, some were good listeners. Some friends let me wallow and others gave me a kick up the bum if needed.

To me, this could also be true of parenting. Different people have different strengths. A women’s strengths may be different to a man’s but that does not mean better. A child will learn different things from all the people they have relationships with.

So, are women better parents than men?

If pushed to answer I would say the better parent is the one who wants their child to be happy, healthy and to grow up reaching their full potential and fulfilling their dreams. I think most men and women want that, and try to achieve it, in their own way, the best way they know how!

9 thoughts on “Are Women Better Parents Than Men?

  1. Carol Cameleon

    Absolutely. And you make a very good point about children being closest to the ones that they spend most time with (which I think may be true but there are different bonds made between different ‘care-givers’) resulting in tantrums etc. In my opinion, children can also be too similar in personality to the one who spends more time with them. Inadvertantly turning them into the ‘bad’ parent – in the eyes of the child at least…

    Reply
  2. thenthefunbegan

    This makes so much sense. I like your comment that the experience each gender gets to have with children makes a reasonable difference to how they do things. While I know my husband is always going to take the easy option and do McDonald’s rather than cooking them a balanced meal or forget to bring coats out or not bother with regular nappy changes, that doesn’t make it true of all men! #theprompt

    Reply
  3. Sara (@mumturnedmom)

    Love this, you’ve made some great points about the differences that can arise in parenting and that these are positive, not negative, and make for a more balanced and rounded approach. And, experience doesn’t necessarily make for ‘better’! Your friendship analogy is great, children need all sorts of influences in their lives. Thank you so much for linking to #ThePrompt it’s lovely to have you join in x

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  4. TwinsplusTwo

    I totally agree, each gender has something different to offer. But I fervently believe that we shouldn’t get caught up in a politically correct blur of “equality” seeking and forget that biologically and anthropologically, women are intended to be the main caregiver in a child’s early years. To pretend otherwise does a HUGE disservice to children. Later on, I think it’s more balanced but those who suggest men can make an equivalent contribution in a baby’s early months are hiding from reality. #PoCoLo

    Reply
    1. mydaysni Post author

      There is of course a truth to that. I think the variety of skills each parent brings is the the important thing in achieving a good well rounded parenting team!

      Reply

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